| My flaw |
[16 Jul 2006|01:33am] |
So I think I may have figured out my flaw, I don't tell people how i actually feel about them. I don't know what to say about it, last night i was angry about it, since it cost me another relationship. But tonights different, i went to type this last night and....it just felt different, I dont know. Maybe being around friends tonight really helped that useless feeling. Don't get me wrong, it still may become awkward between me and her, I mean, it allways does when im unable to tell them what i feel for whatever reason and then they start going out with someone and i still cant tell them....but i digress, and shes going out with someone that when i think about it, about no body likes. But oh well, Dont get me wrong, I really wish i could tell her, I just dont know whats holding me back..........
(plus, it will never work, he is a cub fan, she is a die hard white sox fan) And I can't believe i could end this with a joke when last night i wouldda ended it crying.
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| Summer is finally here! |
[30 May 2006|01:34pm] |
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Hey ecerbody. So it's summer and it's time to have fun. Well, I dont work friday, I just have clinicals from 11-3:30 so call me if you want to do anything.
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| one more week untill it |
[29 Apr 2006|11:45pm] |
I don't think people are meant to be by themselves.
That's why, if you actually find someone you care about...
...it's important to let go of the little things.
...Even if you can't let go all the way.
Because nothing sucks more than feeling all alone...no matter how many people are around.
^not my own, but i liked it, because thats how i feel sometimes......(often)
I really need to get back to the some running so i can feel alive again.
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| So many things i wish i could tell you. |
[24 Apr 2006|09:44pm] |
I never knew
I never knew that everything was falling through
That everyone I knew was waiting on a queue
To turn and run when all I needed was the truth
But that's how it's got to be
It's coming down to nothing more than apathy
I'd rather run the other way than stay and see
The smoke and who's still standing when it clears
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind
Let's rearrange
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage
Say that we agree and then never change
Soften a bit until we all just get along
But that's disregard
Find another friend and you discard
As you lose the argument in a cable car
Hanging above as the canyon comes between
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind
And suddenly I become a part of your past
I'm becoming the part that don't last
I'm losing you and its effortless
Without a sound we lose sight of the ground
In the throw around
Never thought that you wanted to bring it down
I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So many things that i have at the tip of my tongue, just waiting to come out.
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| hmm...no real subject here |
[19 Apr 2006|09:52pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 we all will float on. |
] |
| [ |
music |
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modest mouse |
] |
So I came to the conclusion today that I'm not going to prom, even with help from some other people. It's not the lack of effort, just to little, to late. I know I let myself down in a way, but I feel that I let those around me down more, but then I get over that and just wish I could have asked that one person.....sometime.....
Tennis today was fun with Lower, maybe came up with a new summer job, but I got to sleep on the idea.
I just hope....that I can find what I'm looking for.
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| fuck |
[15 Apr 2006|11:19pm] |
I've been meaning to update for a while now, but I dont feel like it right now.
I'll say something later.
I hope everyone is having a great saturday night, i know i am. (sarcasm is to hard to express over the internet)
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| my second day |
[29 Mar 2006|10:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 exhausted |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
taking back sunday |
] |
So today I talked to this old fellow that everyone labeled as grumpy, I think i really like him.
He was actually a pretty cool guy.
I'm still don't tell you when i go to the Y because I'm afraid......
Woke up yesterday
with you on my mind
so afraid of running out of time
so come around again and i'll show you what i mean
And you can tell me
exactly what you need
and we can talk all night (we can talk all night)
and i will sing you lullabies (i will sing you lullabies)
not in every arrow is pointed straight at your heart
sorry for the time i said too much
i was so afraid that you would fall out of touch
and we can talk all night (we could talk all night)
and i will sing you lullabies (i will sing you lullabies)
not every arrow is pointed straight at your heart
so come around again (so come around again)
and we can talk all night
so come around again, so come around again
and we can talk all night (and we can talk all night)
i will sing you
lullabies
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| updatizzle |
[20 Mar 2006|09:14pm] |
Hmm, not sure what to update.
FIRST competition in a few days, I'm pumped.
Proms a month away, seems like a week, still dont know who I'm going with. Maybe because i all ways wait to long to ask who i really want to go with so i have to "settle" in a way. So I'm let done in a sense, but i wish i could tell them.....
works going fine, only 4 hours this week unfortunately.
spring break should be fun, im stressing fun, some reason i think it will let me down a lot.
well, later my pretties.
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| My day |
[23 Feb 2006|10:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 cheerful |
] |
| [ |
music |
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acousticssssss |
] |
So, apparently saying "Dog food tastes just how it smells, DElicious" only gets you a few laughs in pre-calc. It's ok to laugh, everything has been pre-approved funny by me.
So baseball next week, fun stuff, even though its at an odd time this year. According to Klay, im making the team. right ;)
i cant wait till i can go on another shopping trip, havnet been on one in a while
so, I think i might start narrating my life
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[15 Feb 2006|09:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 drunk penguins are funny |
] |
| [ |
music |
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james blunt |
] |
He had passed visibly through two states and was entering upon a third. After his embarrassment and his unreasonable joy he was consumed with wonder at her presence. He had been full of the idea so long, dreamed it right through to the end, waited with his teeth set, so to speak, at an inconceivable pitch of intensity. Now, in the reaction, he was running down like an overwound clock.
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| chunky monkey from funky town |
[10 Feb 2006|10:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
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counting crows |
] |
How come i feel that every time i open my mouth the only thing that comes out is poop that makes me feel..well, retarded. Everything i say i come to regret. Why? i hate it. argggg.
i even feel that i have someone that i really want to spend time with, but i allways put off telling her because i'm afraid. I'm that whenever i talk to her i'm going to ruin things, I'm afraid i'll lose her, I'm afraid of it all, even though i dont know if we have anything in the first place. I'm to chubby for her.
Oh, and Mr. Bo Jangles, good luck tonight ;) (that play was awesome, and no one will know what im talking about)
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| Oh the humanity!!! |
[05 Jan 2006|04:57pm] |
So yesterday at the hospital i almost saw someone die. That stuff freaked me out.
So, yea, do i still want to get into medicine? hell yea i do
I cant wait till FIRST starts again this saturday, its about time to kick some more robot ass!!!
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[01 Jan 2006|01:11am] |
| [ |
mood |
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better |
] |
HAPPY NEW YEAR.
hope everyone had fun and a safe new years, i did.
i dont know what to say, im sorry?
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| new years |
[30 Dec 2005|10:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 frustrated |
] |
well I hope everyones new years is good
i will probably be spending it at my house all by my lonesome as of now, since nobody has called me with any plans
everything around me is falling apart, nothing can go right right now.
call me.......
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| building |
[18 Dec 2005|12:11am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
happy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
beatles one |
] |
OMG went scuba diving today it was great, only bad part was trying to pop my ears, its so hard.
Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth.
Only, i don't know how they got out, dear.
Turn me back into the pet that i was when we met.
I was happier then with no mind-set.
And if you'd 'a took to me like
A gull takes to the wind.
Well, i'd 'a jumped from my tree
And i'd a danced like the king of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.
New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries.
Hope it's right when you die, old and bony.
Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall,
Never should have called
But my head's to the wall and i'm lonely.
And if you'd 'a took to me like
A gull takes to the wind.
Well, i'd 'a jumped from my tree
And i'd a danced like the kind of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.
God speed all the bakers at dawn may they all cut their thumbs,
And bleed into their buns 'till they melt away.
I'm looking in on the good life i might be doomed never to find.
Without a trust or flaming fields am i too dumb to refine?
And if you'd 'a took to me like
Well i'd a danced like the queen of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.
im just building my physcics bridge, i think its progressing excellentl
i hope you are still feeling better
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[12 Nov 2005|10:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
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death by stereo i guess since the speakers arent working ha |
] |
i kinda hate this, this livejournal thing, its like talking to myself when noones there. i cant really listen to music because my speakers are broke, and theres noone on to talk to so im just overall bored. I'm thinking about doing away with this since noone reads it in the first place and im just wasting my time, but then i get to thinking and i don't have anything better to do with it.
OMG I just found tabs to dekawopper, I'm actually impressed.
What do you do when theres somone you want to call buy you have nothing to talk about? it's so hard to explaine what I mean but...whatever.
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| just another day |
[28 Oct 2005|11:35pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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hopeful |
] |
| [ |
music |
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taking back sunday |
] |
She said
"don't, don't let it go to your head
Boys like you are a dime a dozen,
Boys like you are a dime a dozen"
She said
"you're a touch overrated,
you're a lush and I hate it
but these grass stains on my knees
they won't mean a thing"
And all I (all I)
Need to know (need to know)
Is that I'm something you'll be missing
(is that I'm something that you're missing)
(maybe I should hate for this)
Maybe I should hate you for this
Never really did ever quite get that far
(maybe I should hate for this)
Maybe I should hate you for this
Never really did ever quite get that...
I'd never lie to you
Unless I had to
I'll do what I got to
Unless I had to
I'll do what I got to, the truth
is you could slit my throat
And with my one last gasping breath
I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt
And all I (all I)
Need to know (need to know)
Is that I'm something you'll be missing
(is that I'm something that you're missing)
(maybe I should hate for this)
Maybe I should hate you for this
Never really did ever quite get that far
(maybe I should hate for this)
Maybe I should hate you for this
Never really did ever quite get that...
Cause I'm a wishful thinker with the worst intentions
This'll be last chance you get to drop my name
Cause I'm a wishful thinker with the worst intentions
This'll be last chance you get to drop my name
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (Maybe I should...)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (...hate you for this)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (Maybe I should...)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (...hate you for this)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (Maybe I should...)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (...hate you for this)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (Maybe I should...)
If I'm just bad news, then you're a liar (...hate you for this)
Maybe I should hate you for this
(If only you knew half as much as you pretend to)
Maybe I should hate you for this
(If only you knew half as much as you pretend to)
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| blah |
[10 Oct 2005|07:31pm] |
last night was fun, even though i feel like i invited myself
that kinda bummed me a bit, a lot
im sorry
bananahammock
wheres that person when you just want to talk
grrr.
but hey, i do get contacts tommarow so i guess i can look forward to that
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| havent updated in forever, like anyone reads this |
[21 Sep 2005|04:16pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
wheel in the sky - journey |
] |
so summers over offically
Winter is here again oh Lord,
Haven't been home in a year or more
I hope she holds on a little longer
Sent a letter on a long summer day
Made of silver, not of clay
I've been runnin' down this dusty road
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
I don't know where I'll be tomorrow
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
I've been trying to make it home
Got to make it before too long
I can't take this very much longer
I'm stranded in the sleet and rain
Don't think I'm ever gonna make it home again
The mornin' sun is risin'
It's kissing the day
(chorus)
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
I don't know where I'll be tomorrow
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin'
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